Love making is a duty of love in
marriage. It's something we are to do willingly and lovingly. The husband and
wife must never forget that the claim of ownership they mutually exercise over
one another is given in love, and it is with love that they'll continue the
legitimate use of it.
The moment a man/woman stops
giving regards to his/her wife's/husband's needs, feelings and dignity, sexual
relation between them stops being "Love-making" and it becomes
"sex".
Sex is not bad, though it's not
the same as love making. However, care, respect and a measure of satisfaction
can still be derived from sex, so we can call it second best to love making.
However, the same carelessness
that deteriorated the sexual relationship of husband and wife from love making
to sex will deteriorate the relationship between them further from sex to
sexual abuse/assault where one spouse exert control, domination, and the other
spouse becomes passive and oppressed.
Sexual relation is not fun without
love, respect, care and consideration. A man/woman who has vowed to give
his/her body to his/her spouse has every right to revoke such right if it's
being abused or/ and misused.
Because the promise of access was
given based on the existence of the fundamental principles of trust, integrity,
love, agreement and mutual respect. Once these principles are no longer in
place, the terms of the sexual relationship / marriage has been
violated/broken, and there is need for a re-negotiation. If during the
re-negotiation, the parties are able to reach an agreement, good. If not, they are better off going their
separate ways, till they come to a mutually acceptable conclusion.
There is no point making a bad
situation worse. If an unfavourable situation can still be managed, it should
be managed by all means. But if a situation is unmanageable, stop suffering in
silence and effect the necessary change(s) needed.
Life is to be enjoyed and not to
be endured!
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