The union between a man and woman, though sacred, should not strip either party of their rights as human beings. One of the rights of every human being is to have the freedom to earn a living. While some people believe it is a husband's prerogative to decide whether his wife should earn a living or not, I strongly disagree with this mindset.
Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. The man is generally believed to be the head of the home and the wife, with the duty to provide and protect both the wife and the home. He also has the duty to love and cherish the woman. However, it is generally known that not all men are fulfilling their vow to love and care. Some men are totally immune to the well being and welfare of their wives and home. Yet, they hold with a death-hold grip to their position as the head. They do not play with the rewards and benefits of the position of headship. Forgetting that it is not possible to eat one's cake and have it.
A man should not be irresponsible towards his wife and obligations and still expect to be accorded the privileges and entitlements of the true head of the home. Such a man is just a figure head. Useless and worthless for all purposes, but for appearances. And since the only worth and purpose for such irresponsible husbands is in keeping appearances, his rights as a husband, privileges and entitlements should be in appearances also. It is an error for a woman who has a husband that refuses to rise up to the task of providing and protecting her and the home to put her life/livelihood into the hands of such a husband. It is cruel on the part of a man to insist his wife should not work and at the same time fail to perform his duty towards her and the home. Nobody should be given that kind of power over another human being.
Heartbreaking is the fact that when victims of such a situation reports the husband to family members, friends and/or religious heads, they are told to go and submit to the wishes of the man. And by so doing, they nail the coffin the irresponsible husband made for the wife's suffering. In no time, the woman becomes a destitute. Unable to cater for her needs and those of her children, while the irresponsible man piles abuse upon abuse on her. And the same people that advised her to obey her irresponsible husband are the ones that will end up blaming her for her situation. By the time all these happen, the woman would have lost all sense of identity and worth. She would have been damaged if not destroyed.
A man is not expected to steal or live beyond his means to fulfill his responsibilities towards his wife and home. As long as he is doing his best based on his earning power, he is fulfilling his duty as the head of the wife/home. He is worthy of all the privileges and entitlements due to the head of the home. But even at that, the decision to work or not to work should be left to the woman. It's her human right, it should be respected. A man that doesn't want his wife to work should marry a woman that does not wish to work. The desire and ambition of women need not be sacrificed on the alter of love. This is a major injustice towards women.
The need to work and give expression to personal gifts and talents in a person goes beyond earning a living. Even if the husband meets all the financial and material needs of the wife, there will still be a vacuum in her if she wants to work and she is not allowed to. A loving and responsible husband will know and respect the need of his wife and allow her to fulfill her dreams while she supports him in fulfilling his. Woman, you have a right to earn a living. Anyone that asks you to give up this right against your wish is not your friend.
Life is to be enjoyed and not to be endured!
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